Thursday, July 28, 2011

Fly. Be Free.

Today I caught your eyes
Peeking out at me
From the Liquid Crystal
So bright and so cheery

Inside I know the reason
Things are how they need to be
So I opened up my heart
And gladly set you free

No matter the size of the cage, it is still a cage.  Freedom must be whole, it must be complete, or it is meaningless.  The weight of captivity can drag the most stoic heart from the sky and grind it into the earth like broken glass.

The singing heart is caged no more, the bars are razed and the sky looms above without limit.  Now I watch the songbird take flight, steel against the blowing winds, and with but a quick glance back, off it goes.

The weight lifted at last. <3

"Friends can help each other. A true friend is someone who lets you have total freedom to be yourself - and especially to feel. Or, not feel. Whatever you happen to be feeling at the moment is fine with them. That's what real love amounts to - letting a person be what he really is. "
-Jim Morrison

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

A Long Time Coming...

I dipped my finger in the sky
the beauty of it made me weep
and I held it there for as long as i could
until the clouds dripped into my smile
and the sunshine wrapped itself gently around my eyes
while the blue crept down my finger
and made me remember rainy afternoons spent daydreaming
lost in the wilderness of my heart
and of the blue skies
we used to sing of
in dreams...

Sunday, July 17, 2011

This I Believe...

Once upon a time, I gave someone some advice.  Without filling in the context, the advice was more or less as follows:

"Love brutally and with all the caution of a Great White Shark. Throw yourself into it with wild abandon.  Let it out. Love stupidly. You're probably going to get hurt, for sure, but the time before the hurt... damn!"

There is so much more than the obvious advice here.  The Great White Shark is a pretty serious fish. It's one of the largest predators in the ocean, and yet they have so many vulnerabilities. They are at the mercy of their environment, for starters. They have to keep moving so as not to die, and that makes nets a serious threat.  And they see the world with their mouths. What's this?  I don't understand it.  Let me bump it with my nose, so very close to my eyes and see if it's interesting...  Let me take it into my mouth and see if it is food or not. Let me bring this strange thing inside of me, into a place so very vulnerable and close to my brain.  Let me take this unknown thing into me and taste it.  Let me see if it is good or bad, soft or spiny, edible or killing.

This is a wonder to me.  In order to Grok it's world, the shark must put it's own life at risk. In order to know if this love is going to be a good thing, one must take it inside of oneself, let it fill you up.  Only then will you know if it's going to help you grow or going to drag you into the depths of madness.  Interesting, huh?

So these days I find myself taking love inside, examining it, turning it over to see if it is good or bad, soft or spiny, nourishing or killing.  And what I have in me is most incredible, most nourishing, and more perfect in every way.
Love.  Free and Open.  Honest.  Pure. A Living, breathing creature needing to cared for with tenderness and understanding.  I am thankful for all I have close to me and my heart.  And I believe that the Great White Shark is a noble and majestic creature that deserves to be respected and revered.

Like I said, if I were a Snapple Cap, I'd say "Be the shark"

How about you?


Friday, July 8, 2011


The Grand Gray Shark cut through the thick atmosphere with fins rigidly out and a toothy grin feeding twin mouths.  The skysea lapped at it's flanks, tugging without effect and longing to slow the great creature to stall and fall to the earth below.  But it kept gulping mightily, swallowing air and super-heating it, cruising gracefully as it left condensate in it's path, remnants of collided vapor that belied it's stealthy way.  From inside it's gullet, I dreamed of love, of life, and of that I left behind.  I dreamed of the future, and of the arms into which I would be falling so soon.  I dreamed of the never-has-been, and the unforeseeable futures left open to unseeing eyes.  All the while, the Grand Gray Shark fed.

My ears caught the familiar tell-tale of a bell, rousing me from my slumber. Attendants skimmed to and for, watering and feeding my cabin mates, easing weary stomaches and begging the leftovers with outstretched hands, wrapped delicately in latex-free gloves so as not to become infected by attachment to any one passenger.  Nothing puts a crimp in a free-flying lifestyle like attachment. 

But that isn't true. 

Attachment is what drives my life.  I find myself crossing the continent yet again heading West to share space, contact, and air with my love.  I have ached for so long to feel her hand in mine.  I have gazed upon her visage illuminated in the night and cast into my eyes through liquid crystal, but that is a sorry substitute for standing beside her, feeling her fingertips reaching out to mine, proving once again that this love is real, that our feelings have merit, and that I am worthy of such a love.  I am aware that it is unfair of me to sing this song without glancing back to my Easterly residence and winking at my love there, as well.  She smiles at me the same, her twinkling eyes bringing me joy in subtly different ways, but joy just the same.  Two different loves, with freedom and trust the fruits born of a tree grown from hard work, honesty, and many a tear.  On the surface, freedom is enviable, but where it counts, one realizes that it is not so easily attained.  One must be vigilant against so many emotions waiting to tear at the heart of the love, coiled like a fierce creature ready to pounce and render all that effort wasted.  It takes courage to bear one's soul to another, let alone two or more.  It is the most rewarding, yet the most demanding lifestyle I could ever have imagined.  And yet, I rise early each morning and lie down late each evening to make sure I have spent what time I can with each of them.  I look into the future and wonder if this will last, then I look into the past and smile knowingly.  Yes.  IT will last as long as the love between us, as long as the love among us, continues. 

My heart is singing a song loud enough to share.  And my life's journey continues to get more and more interesting as the days march on. 

I ask you to not judge me.  If you must, I ask that you judge me for the example I set, rather than your personal view of right or wrong.  

(Note: I wasn't sure if I would post this, but those who know me won't be surprised that I did.  Love to those who believe in me, and who continue to support me in my travels.  <3<3)